Tuesday, June 25, 2013

A Voice is a Powerful Gift

So, you know something I've found that I've taken for granted very much and didn't realize it until this past year?
My voice.
I think I've said this before, but I'm not the best talker. I'm not articulate when it comes to words and speaking especially to quiet people or strangers. I usually had to be reallllly hyper in order to be okay talking to people.
Well, I'm not going to say that I can now talk to any person with 100% confidence and 0 difficulty, but I have been talking more and being more confident and therefore it is less difficult.
I don't know how or when it started really.
I always know whyyyy I didn't like talking as much. I'll tell you my main reasons.
1. I always would think a lot and doubt myself. So conversations were stressful because after a conversation I would analyze what I said, how awkward I sounded, anything stupid that I said, points where I should have said something more, etc.
2. I was afraid that if I messed up with my words, that people would dislike me or think I'm weird or it'd just create a huge awkward mess, etc.
3. I love to write. And why would I need to talk so much when I can express myself through writing all the time? I'm good that even though I'm not always good at talking. I have time to think things through and time to change something if I don't like the way it turns out once I've written it. You can't undo spoken words.

But in all that I missed the beauty and power and gift of having a voice. Sometimes spoken words mean more because you can't undo them. Because their precious. And because they aren't as easy to fake as words in writing can be sometimes.
Sometimes having spoken words, help you connect to people more. It teaches you to listen more. And it can teach you to focus less on yourself and on your mistakes sometimes. Because I realized the more I talked and talk to people, strangers or friends, the more it comes easy. The more you enjoy it and don't overthink it. You just are yourself and have a good time. And you really care about the people so conversation comes easier because you genuinely want to know things or tell them things. And sometimes it's just fun to joke around and laugh and make people smile with your spoken words.
I think I started to realize this, and the importance of it, when God showed me what I could do with it. And how it wasn't so hard or scary if I focused less on what other people thought and learned that I could do stuff with it that I can't do with writing alone.
God also helped me with speaking when I went with our church youth group to go evangelize to people at the beach. I used to be so scared and wouldn't go up and talk to people at all. But something was different when I went. God gave me the words, not just to come up to them, but to actually talk to them. Its a very beautiful thing being able to share the Gospel with strangers. And I've missed out on many opportunities to do that.
I'm not an expert at being outgoing or talkative all the time. I still love writing, and will continue to do that still. I enjoy moments of silence between two people where you don't have to talk constantly and you feel comfortable just being there together.
However, I am becoming bolder, and I am learning the beauty of a voice and I'm starting to use the gift God gave me.
You have a voice too.
Do you use it?

1 comment:

  1. Hey Soph, just wanted to say:

    "I really, like really really like this; 'cause I'm in the same boat. Those last words were really food for thought; I have a voice, Do I use it? Do I use it for the VERY best?"

    I read this when you posted, but wasn't able to comment then, so I thought I would now. =)
    Aaaaand, I have a blog to recommend you to :http://lindseybuchmann.blogspot.com/ (normally I don't do this, but I remember you had wanted to improve your selfies, and this girl is a natural at it! So take a look if you so feel inclined. =))

    An' have a nice day.

    xx `Jenny