Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Weeks Upon Weeks of April

Let's keep April going, please.
I have liked April a lot.
I have liked this weekend a lot.
This past weekend I went to downtown disney for the first time.
It was a blast.
From the car ride,
to the shops,
to the free birthday cupcake,
 to the ghiradelli shake,
to the disney art, to the disney music,
 to the disney statues,
to the car ride back,
to watching the third Hobbit, to "The Last Goodbye".
It was wonderful.
This week has been pretty grand too.
Not a whole lot of stuffes, but just enough stuffes.
Like rain, and starbucks, and cleaning, and soccer, and injuries, and dance parties, and pie nights, and coffee, and papers,

So, April, you're ending soon.
I wish you all, a very fond, farewell.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

When it rains it pours...

Ironic how a drama filled, cloudy day happened to be literally a rainy and gloomy one.
There's a lot going on at college and maybe it's the end of the semester, but I definitely know it's taken it's toll on everyone.
Thankfully God is strong in our weakest hours.
This verse has just been resounding beautifully in my ears;
"But of Israel he says, “All day long I have held out my hands to a disobedient and contrary people.”
--Romans 10:21
Whenever I had read this verse in the past, I always focused on how bad it was that the people of Israel were disobedient. What I didn't focus on was how even though God knew Israel was going to be disobedient and contrary, He still held out His hands all day long to them. Not just after they repented and turned to them. Not just momentarily to see if they would take His hands and then when they didn't, He didn't put His hands down. He held out His hands all day long to them. You know, He does that to you and me too. We're disobedient people too. We don't always do what we're supposed to. However, God still reaches His hands to us in spite of it all. In spite of whether we're remorseful or not His hands will still reach for us. He longs for us to turn to Him. When I read this verse now, I just can't help but feel love in my heart, and be overwhelmed by how wonderful He is and have the urge to just obey and love Him more.
The Bible can turn anything bad into good.
Maybe this day wasn't a perfect day, but it still was beautiful and God is still good and there won't be any perfect days until I get to Heaven.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Coffee Dates

This week has already started off well.
Yesterday, I ended up going on walks with my friends, getting a phone call from old friend, getting Starbucks, playing soccer, and reading Mere Christianity. It was actually a pretty busy but wonderful day.

And today, although it's only 10 in the morning, is a good day too.
It was a coffee and bagel date at Einstein bagels with my unit mates who are all leaving next semester. It's sad they are leaving, but it wasn't sad hanging out with them. It was refreshing and beautiful. We just had a really good time and we don't usually have time to hang out because of our schedules. Later today, I have rehearsal for reading spoken word at a concert and going for half-price appetizers with the unit.
It's a good day.
I feel it in my bones.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

And I think to myself, what a wonderful weekend

This weekend was one of the best birthday weekends I have ever had in my entire life.
It was golden retrievers, free chips and salsa, music bands, old fashioned cream soda, walks on the pier watching the stars in the sky and listening to gentle waves, it was chocolate milkshakes and The House on the End of the Street.
It was the Uninvited, Chocolate Cake, Beach Adventures, being photobombed by a baby, Mellow Mushroom pizza, laughter, undeserving gifts, climbing a gigantic tree, pictures in a yellow mushroom, weird target cashier, starbucks frapps, Woman in Black 2, seeing fireworks from my bedroom window shoot off in the night sky which I am sure was only for my birthday.
It was watching a musical, buddy brew coffee, walk a long the river, games, birthday dinner, muffins, baked cookies, lots of chocolate, a painting,
basically everything wonderful that could happen, did happen.
I just am overwhelmed by love.
This 21st birthday was on point.

Friday, April 17, 2015

Shake off the Dust

I won't ask you for advice,
you already hurt me twice.
I'm not a back-up plan.
And you're not my biggest fan.
So let the wind blow us where we need to be.
It's the only way we can be free.
No need to act like everything is perfectly fine,
I have read and seen the warning signs.
So let the windows break,
Take off the mask that's fake,
and let fate be fate.
I'm not mad, but I'm also not blind,
Let's move forward and leave the past behind.
Let's move forward and leave the past behind.

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Rain Drops and Coffee Cup

Today was libraryness, Gilmore Girls, paper critiquing, dinner conversations and busted guts, free Wawa coffee, Rain Drops, watching Criminal Minds cozied in a friend's unit and listening to the calming rain.
Tomorrow, begins my birthday weekend and I'm excited. :)

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Aren't we just paintings after all?

You told me,
aren't we just paintings anyways?
Blurred images full of lines...
I'm not the artist, I can't call this life mine.

The evidence is in the artist's brush.
The evidence is in the Bible, and that's enough.
I'm painted, formed, wonderfully made.
I've been bought with a price,
by your blood I am saved.

Monday, April 13, 2015

Black Embers

Everything you held dear, when the tables turn,
Grow darker still but at least you learn,
How to rub your eyes when the embers burn,
How to rub your eyes when the embers burn.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

1:30 am

Some nights you will have friends that stay up with you until 1:30 am and you'll wonder why but you won't question it because somehow your friendship deepens in the early hours of the morning when they could leave but they don't and you're half-asleep and half-awake and eating cookies because you can and talking about how Winter the dolphin should be freed even though you don't even know why you're saying that and laughing about things that one day you'll forget and whispering about things that may or may not matter and consuming way too much sugar which is probably the sole reason that everyone is able to stay awake and those nights,

 my friends,

those nights are the ones that will remain dear in your hearts,
the ones you take out from your mind on rainy days,
the ones you water so the seeds can become flowers someday.

Whether remain friends through the years or not,
I'll treasure that night.

Because that's what you do to memories.

Even if the people change,
even if distance tears things apart in some form,
you treasure the memories made with the people you love.

The memories don't change even when the world does.

Friday, April 10, 2015

Cover your crystal eyes and feel the tones that tremble down your spine

Liar's dice,
Ice Cream,
Mere Christianity,
Disney Princesses,
Popcorn Thursdays,
Surprise Birthday Parties,
Nominated and Elected VP of the Drama Club,
Description Paper,
Chinese Food,
This was my Thursday and parts of my Friday.
I am living, and loving, and it feels so swell.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Your eyes shine brighter than that

I know that insecurities cloud your mind,
but the people that degrade you are the ones that are blind.

Constellations in Our Hearts

Yesterday it was October and I was walking through corn mazes and wearing plaid and carving pumpkins and today it's April and I don't know how this happened. But I'm okay with April. I know it's a good April because I feel it in the caverns of my heart. I'm listening to the new Death Cab for Cutie Album and anxiously awaiting the new Of Monsters and Men album coming out in June and I'm making plans and talking about life and exploring new things and I only have one month left of school and I'm writing meaningful papers and drinking iced coffee and loving the sun but craving the mountains but overall I'm simply loving the simple things.

"As we're dissolving into the sea,
I only take what I can carry.
As the council's combing through our debris,
For the treasures we never buried."

Monday, April 6, 2015


So long;
crepes, chats, library visits, coffee cups, beach drives, sunset picnics, sleeping in late, books to read, sister time, beach visits, Cinderella, xmen, card games, Easter party, laughter, superb mac and cheese.

My marvelous, relaxing, spring break.
"I don't matter."
"Don't say that, we all matter."


Reason #4657893390 why I love Merlin and wish it was still on.

Saturday, April 4, 2015

You didn't tell me...

The door hates goodbyes but welcomes hellos.
However, goodbyes are often necessary in life.
Didn't you teach me that?
In numbers and riddles, I realize we're the same.
But who, in the end, actually wins this game?
Or is there a loss only?
You didn't tell me,
No, you didn't tell me.

And the mystery pulling at my sleeves is one I'll ignore.
For I have grown to hate and loathe that door,
For a crime the door did not commit,
It's just the puzzle pieces never fit.
And I'd rather unwravel the threads than take the time to learn to knit.

You didn't tell me...
You didn't tell me.

Friday, April 3, 2015

It's not easy...

I'm AB positive and you're O negative.
You see, It's not that easy.
Not that simple.

Our blood runs differently and so do our souls.

This may sound really deep or maybe just really stupid but I wrote this because I thought of this, not because it means something to me because it doesn't. But maybe it means something to you who reads this, and that's why I write.

Thursday, April 2, 2015


I just want to take this moment to appreciate my two favorite book characters:
Elizabeth Darcy and Jo March.

I'm not a feminist in the sense of valuing woman's rights more than men's rights and I actually believe women have certain roles just as men do but I absolutely love these women's personalities. I love their quick and witty minds, the fact that they do have a mind of their own and aren't afraid to speak up for what they think is right or wrong. They are strong characters and they are quite able to hold their own. I love their knack for adventure, walks, and reading of books. Their love for traveling and sights. I love Jo's writer mind and how she acts out and writes plays for her sisters. I love both of their loves for their sisters. Now, I believe they both have their faults too. But this makes them more real and human to me. Elizabeth does have her pride to work on, and Jo has a hot temper and needs to work on forgiveness throughout the book. But, overall, these characters are commendable to me and intrigue me. Having their mistakes written out reminds me to learn from theirs and watch out for my own and all the characteristics I enjoy from them, I can also take in and learn and aspire to be like. Why am I writing about these characters? Because if you haven't read or watched these books (Pride and Prejudice and Little Women), I urge you too. Maybe you disagree and don't find these characters to be your favorite. That's okay. I want people to form their own opinions and you can't judge until you've read and seen those books and movies for your ownself. And if you have read or seen them, kudos to you! I hope you enjoyed them as much as I have. 

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

19 days

And I'll be 21... I always thought I'd be more adultish at 21 but I have a feeling I won't be. I'm still trying to figure out how to be an adult but for now I think I'll keep listening to King And the Lionheart (my absolute favorite song), watching Criminal Minds, bonding with my sister, and finishing out this college semester. Maybe in the midst of it all, I will magically change into an adult. But if anything magical were to occur, I would want it to be a visit from a unicorn named Rodriguez. In the meantime enjoy an old but snazzy snaz picture of young Matthew Gray Gubler:

Juuuust kidding... I tried, I failed. It's not working. Rain check?