Sunday, August 21, 2016

Changes Change Too

So, I've been sick this weekend and I've had a lot of thinking time because I feel like that's what you do when you're sick. Besides sleeping and watching tv, you think and if you're me, you think a lot.
Overthinking gets me into trouble sometimes but merely thinking isn't actually a bad thing.
Sometimes we need to take time to pause and reflect upon life and that's what I did.

I brought out memories from my past and it's weird to do so because some things are so different from what they used to be. But it's not necessarily bad. I like where I am in life now. For awhile, it was a bit confusing adjusting to not school life but I am working now and my best friend is working too but we still have days where we can just get together and I can go to bible study at my church and participate in our local ministry and although I miss my time at college, I am happy to be here and do things I missed out on when being at college. I've found my place once again.

I think, like good 'ole Ecclesiastes states; "There is a time for everything."

What's confusing is just when we're stuck trying to figure out what our time is for and what we're meant to be doing in the time given to us.

My time as a student may be over but I'm actually glad to be able to spend my time right now pouring into the lives of children who desperately need love.

I'm glad to be able to do things, even if they're small, like going to our church's ladies retreat or Hallelujah festival that I wasn't able to do when I was away at school.

And who knows what the future will hold?

I won't be working at the preschool forever and my best friend and I maybe won't have as much time as we do now to hang out like we get to do.

I can't see this right now but a large portion of my friends are getting engaged and married and moving and someday that might be me.

I might be whisked off one day to another state and live a whole new chapter of life and miss the small things that I am experiencing now.

It's just change happens all the time.
I had this phrase a few years back that I keep in my head and it's "changes change too".
Because, you see, I used to dread change because change can be bad or scary.
But even if some changes are bad or scary or not the changes you had hoped for, they change too.
For the worse or for the better, those changes will one day change so get what you can out of it now.
Appreciate it and cherish those moments.
And hang on tight, because it will change again.

One day you might be 16 going to highschool and dreading algebra and going to football games in the Fall and the next you might be 22 and have graduated college and working at a preschool and stepping out into the world bright eyed and hopeful and the next blink of an eye you might be in your 30's with a kid or two and a husband by your side helping you figure out how to raise those munchkins.

Everything changes.
This world is temporary.
I'm not who I was at 16.
When I'm in my 30's I'm most likely not going to be who I am right now at 22.
Life changes.

So, hold tight.

Dye your hair red even if it's scary to change your hair color because hair grows out.
And you can cut hair.
And red hair matches Fall.
And you're young.
It's okay to change.
It is.

I've quoted Perks of Being a Wallflower before and I'll probably do it again.
Because as much as that movie/book has some things I disagree with in there,
a lot of these quotes I agree with.
Because it touches on the fragile thing that is life.
It touches on memories and stories and making things count.
And I think that's something we need to recognize and appreciate.
And I know a lot of people don't.
But this life,
this fragile and frail life,
it's something we need to appreciate because it's not always as long as we think it might be.

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