Wednesday, June 1, 2016

There's this girl I know

There's this girl I know. She ran away from her family. She spat lies and insults at them.
She got in cars with strange men. She destroyed her life. She's still destroying her life. She's pushing away the one thing that can save her. She knows it can save her, and she rejects it. She's unhappy and miserable but too arrogant to change. I got to see this girl after a year of not seeing her. This girl recounted memory after memory after memory of the good times. But she didn't talk about the bad times. She cheated. She lied. She stole. But she didn't talk about that. She talked about how good she was. She talked about how smart she was. She pretended like everything was great and like she was so great. 

This girl breaks my heart. 
I felt weighed down by her darkness.
Because it was so clearly consuming her.
And she was running into it.

 I pretended I was okay and not affected by what I saw. 

But I'm not.

Because this girl breaks my heart and I think I have finally realized that it's okay to be broken by things like this.

You're supposed to have your heart broken when you see things like this.

So, I'm being honest here.
I'm having a hard time.
Because I am heavy hearted.
I know I will be okay.
But, I'm feeling sad.
And that's also okay.
It's okay to be heartbroken over this.

It's one of the saddest things when someone is stumbling in the darkness but refuses the candle offered to them.

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