4:00 a.m Thoughts

So, yesterday, I got up at 4:00 am to ride with my Mom to drive my sister down to get dropped off at a bus that would take her to an airport where she would be leaving for Honduras on a Missions Trip.

 

The surprising fact of the matter is that I am widely awake at 4:00 am.

I have deep thoughts and wonders and dreams.

I enjoyed the hour round trip there and back up before the sun and before most of the world.

I enjoyed looking at the stars, talking with my family about memories and insomniacs and appreciating how quiet it is in the still of the morning.

I enjoyed having time set aside to simply think and ponder life.

 

 

I don't know why, but I feel extremely disconnected from the world at those times, and extremely connected with God.

 

The darkness of the nighttime sky has never scared me.

It just awes me.

I enjoy the night where the streetlights and stars finally get to shine and show what they are capable of.

I love the night and early mornings.

Even if I'm not always awake to enjoy it.

 

I've decided that one day, my husband and I are going to go on late night/early morning adventures. Because every once in awhile, it'd be nice to get coffee from some 24-hour diner, eat an early breakfast, and go to the beach and watch the sun rise and appreciate the beginning of a new day together. Or just to go to a park with a telescope and find constellations and name stars. Or to ride around and guess where the people in the car next to us are going to or why they are up at that early hour.

 

 

I tend to do that by myself. I wonder where people are going or why they are up or what their life is like. This also may sound really crazy, but I feel like we share a special bond between us or secret because we're both up at an early hour for whatever reason it is.

Early morning drives are adventurous, indeed.
And time is funny in those moments where you feel as if you aren't supposed to be awake, but you are.
It feels as if the time melts off the clock, and suddenly hours and minutes don't matter.
It's just a façade anyways.
Time.
It seems full of meaning, but that's only because we give it meaning.
 

 

When I came back it was about 5:30 am.

I read a chapter in my book, because that's also entirely calming.

Then, I went back to my bed at 6:00 am where some people might be just then getting up.

Honestly, it's something thrilling, that feeling of doing something opposite than others.

I don't know why it is, but it is.

It feel rebellious.

It feels adventurous.

 

 

I know that quote is extremely overused, and I extremely wished that it would never become so popular that people would use it at any given time and moment carelessly throwing it into the air because they liked the way it sounded... but even though it is popular, and people do carelessly throw around that phrase, I don't carelessly use it.

You see,
I only used it because,
I swear,
I
 was
 infinite.
In those fine, precious, and peculiar moments,
I was infinite.