Swallowing Embers

I swallowed embers in the sky,

the day the tree burned and died.

And the constellations, I'm just sure, matched the colors of your eyes.

And in the car, a sad song came on that made me want to cry.

But the feeling didn't last,

Though the burning tree and the purple-blue song made me think of the past.

And the future makes me scared,

Because what if's haunt me like the people who never cared.

But life is the song that will never fade,

Because the memories surround us just like the ones that have never been made.

Am I losing my mind or losing the words?

To say what has never and always have been heard.

If I click my heels will I still get my wish?

Or did I lose my chance when I crouched in that ditch,

Where I sought myself but only found a handful of sand,

squirming,

searching,

for miles and miles,

miles of what?

Miles of bodies trying to make sense of life,

trying to describe what they were feeling inside,

and coming up short,

because we always get the short end of the stick,

or do we constantly choose to pick it?

That's what I found out when my eyes saw myself knee deep in sin.

We are broken people, broken men and woman.

Losing because we never put faith in the one who won.

You don't live until your life has finally begun,

it will not begin until you seek Him,

it will not begin until you find Him,

it will not begin until you give yourself up each and every day,

until you say Here I am Lord,

and walk away,

from the chains,

the noose,

your selfish ambitions hanging loose,

leave the weight on the ground,

let the blood of Jesus wipe it away,

then your old life will rot and decay,

you will be transformed, renewed, and new.

You will start to become you.

So swallow the embers,

Look up at the stars,

but don't forget who made you who you are.